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Freedom from The Ex-Factor

Apr 11, 2022
adult by body of water

How much time does your ex factor into your day? Is it more than you would like? Does it seem like your ex is renting space in your brain for free, even though your ex doesn’t actually live with you? Well, if that’s the case, it’s time to evict your ex, reclaim your brain, and find freedom from “The Ex-Factor” drama!

Reclaim Your Mental Bandwidth 

I consider mental energy as a finite source that gets used up throughout the day when doing mental tasks, like planning, making decisions, paying attention, or remembering details, or dealing with emotions. As the day goes on, we expend this mental energy, sometimes unknowingly, and by the end of the day, our ability to make good decisions can start to wane.

For example, this could be like eating healthy all day and then by the end, you can’t resist eating the sugary treats in the pantry. When you are co-parenting with an ex, your brain can spend the day spinning around what the other parent may or may not be doing with the kids during their parenting time. 

Learn to Quit Worrying

While the ex may not be physically in the same home anymore, they are mentally residing in your brain, taking up space and using up mental energy that could be used for better purposes. Have you ever spent the day worrying about what your ex will say, do, or not do? How does that impact your life? Maybe you aren’t able to focus at work. Or maybe you aren’t present with your kids. Or maybe you are more irritable by the end of the day because you don’t have the energy to manage your emotions. Or perhaps you turn to food or alcohol to help you relax after expending so much energy thinking about your ex.

It doesn’t have to be this way! You can reclaim the space in your brain and evict your ex. You can be free from your ex drama factoring into your daily life. In fact, the only person who is making you use up this mental energy is you! This is actually great news because you are the one who can actually decide how you want to budget your mental energy in whatever way is best for you. You can get your time and energy back so you choose what you want to be doing in your free time.  

Start thinking about how you want to be living in your life, instead of thinking about the ex who is not living life with you anymore. For me, the last way I want to spend my day is thinking about my ex. I would much rather use my mental energy figuring out how I can make my day and my life even better. 

Evict Your Ex & Get Your Brain Back!

In my coaching program, Figure Life Out With Dr. Stef, you will learn how to Reclaim Your Brain and find freedom from “The Ex Factor” with these four skills. 

  1. FLO-Triage - learn how to triage the issues and problems that arise with your ex, to figure out how to pick your battles.
  2. FLO-Communication - learn techniques to craft an email that will minimize conflict and increase effective communication.
  3. FLO-Parenting - Learn how to co-parent as the best parent you can be.
  4. FLO-Coaching - figure out what your bigger and better future looks like for you and how to attain it. 

Freedom from drama with your ex is available for you! I can help you learn to budget your mental energy so it works for you, not against you.


Schedule a free Next Steps Call with Dr. Stef (me!) to discuss what's feeling hard to you and determine how coaching can help you get back to living YOUR life.

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